JOKES +(updated weekly)

FOR FRIDAY December 19, 2014

 

Good Friday Morning,

My Jukebox this week last of the Christmas sounds. Week number 4.

http://jhurray.com/mp3/jukebox.htm

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

This weeks Funny Graphics

http://jhurray.com/HTML/PictureBonus.htm

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Thanks Mark

The Christmas Jumpers

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdVQHSXapak

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Now this is Caroling

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnIQinb8ofk

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Thanks Jack

25 Biggest Rip-offs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lFRyF9MxElE

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

The Doghouse

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Twivg7GkYts

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The Return to the Doghouse

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mqxcr-VWcL0

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Thanks Babe

Michigan (Please send me a Link to your State – Jim)

http://vimeo.com/49133017

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Thanks Good Clean Funnies

Grace

Saying Grace at mealtime was a tradition at Grandma's house.

At breakfast, lunch and supper, all who gathered around the table would bow their heads to give blessing for the food they were about to eat.

Much to Grandma's sadness, this tradition was not brought to our home by my mother, so as a three-year-old, the practice of saying Grace was very confusing to me.

Mother embarrassingly recalls that once, while Grandma rambled through one of her lengthy mealtime blessing and thanks, I asked in a rather loud voice, "Why is Grandma talking to her plate?"

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Thanks Steve Just For Grins

Honesty

My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he’d dropped his toothbrush in the toilet.

So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage.

Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush.

He held it up and said with a charming little smile, "We better throw this one out too then, ’cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Farmer Don

Farmer Don was having trouble getting his neighbor to keep his chickens fenced in. The neighbor kept talking about chickens being God's creatures, and as such they had the right to go where they wanted.

Don was having no luck keeping the chickens out of his flowerbeds, and he had tried everything. Two weeks later, on a visit I noticed his flowerbeds were doing great. The flowers were beginning to bloom.

So I asked him how he managed to keep the birds away. "How did you make your neighbor keep his hens in his own yard?"

"One night I hid half a dozen eggs under a bush by my flower bed," Farmer Don told me, "and the next day I let my neighbor see me gather them. I wasn't bothered after that."

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Thanks Jack

Did you know that?

Mrs. Claus, Santa's wife, was first introduced to the world in 1889 in the book "Goody Santa Claus On A Sleigh Ride" by the poet Katherine Lee Bates.

In Australia, Christmas comes in the middle of summer and the temperature often hits a sweltering 100 degrees Fahrenheit on Christmas day. During this warm Australian Christmas season, outdoor barbecues have become a part of the Christmas tradition.

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer was originally created for Montgomery Ward department stores as part of a promotional gimmick.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Fun Christmas Facts

The song "White Christmas" holds the credit as the most-selling Christmas single of all time.

Santa Claus has nine reindeer counting Rudolph that pull his sleigh.

Saturnalia, was the Romans holiday that was celebrated in December.

It wasn't until about 200 years after Christ's death that Christians started celebrating his birth.

In northern Europe there was a holiday known as Yule. They celebrated this holiday by making great fires. They then would dance around the fires, yelling for the winter to end.

Austria was the first country to issue a Christmas postage stamp.

Silver and gold are the popular Christmas colors after red and green.

Eggnog the popular Christmas food was an American discovery.

The Christmas carol "I Saw Momma Kissing Santa Claus" was made famous by Jimmy Boyd when he was just 12 years old.

Christmas lights were invented by the American Ralph E. Morris.

W. C. T. Dobson invented the Christmas card.

Canada is the largest exporter of Christmas trees.

King's Canyon National Park, California has the world's largest Christmas tree.

Coca-Cola made the concept of Santa Claus popular in America.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Thanks Mark

POINTS TO PONDER...

 

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really like someone? That's common sense leaving your body.

------------------------------------------------------------

I don't like making plans for the day because then the word "premeditated" gets thrown around in the courtroom.

---------------------------------------------------

I didn't make it to the gym today. That makes five years in a row.

-------------------------------------------------------

Dear paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for murderers; if you find one, what's your plan?

Click To Please send me your short clean Jokes  -   RETURN TO JOKES+ MENU 

Welcome Visitor